Do Unto Others

I like the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I think it's from the Bible (Matthew 7:12) although I've never read it. I don't believe in any religion but I think most religions probably have their hearts in the right place and it's just peoples' interpretations and application of them that go awry. I'd expect that most of the people around me are Christians and yet I don't see a whole lot of doing unto others going on these days.

What I see is a lot of me my mine, and a lot of what about me, and a lot of my wants are more important than your needs. I see it in the way people drive, when they screw each other over to get a car length ahead, or take a handicapped parking spot just so they can save walking thirty or forty feet with their able body, or when they run a red light while cars are lined up waiting to turn left. They behave wholly like creatures who expect better treatment than anything they'd ever dish out to others.

Over the years, I've built up a mental list of things I'd do if I were in charge of it all. This seems like as good a time as any to list some of them, for posterity.

1) For those who drop trash (like empty potato chip bags, and fast food wrappers) on the ground as they walk or drive in their cars, I'd take the sum total of everything they've ever discarded in that way, and double it, and deposit it in their home. And right after they finished cleaning it all out, I'd put it right back. And again, a few more times.

2) For anyone who speeds along a closing lane past a line of slowed vehicles, I'd have spikes like they use in rental car parking lots pop up between them and the lane they're ultimately going to try to get back into.

3) For the people who feel no shame in carrying on loud cellphone conversations in public places, I'd interrupt every TV or movie viewing they attempt for the next week with the sound of jackhammers and power drills.

4) For the parents who act like jerks and idiots whenever their children compete, I'd give them nightmare after nightmare in which they see hideous fates befalling their kids until they start appreciating just how lucky they are just to have healthy children to love.

5) For those who knowingly abuse systems intended to help truly needy people, I'd make them truly needy.

6) For those who buy items on the black market, I'd take away everything they own.

7) For the kids who love to deface other peoples' property with graffiti or other forms of vandalism, I'd find the thing they love most in the world and tear it to shreds.

8) For anyone who thinks breaking glass on walkways and bikepaths is great fun, I'd cover the floors of their bedrooms and bathrooms with very small and sharp shards of their favourite glass object.

9) And every violent crime ever committed would be paid back twice-fold, immediately.

And with all those forms of feedback, which mostly seem missing in our current world, maybe people would behave better toward others than they do now. Cuz this whole hoping they do it on their own don't seem to be working!